- rosario dawson says she bought the haunted mansion on zillow
- the only candles they have for a seance are “vanilla-scented yankee candles” because rosario dawson “kept forgetting to cancel [her] amazon subscription”
- during the seance tiffany haddish burns sage which she bought from costco
- during the seance tiffany haddish invites a ghost to write a message using “a pen and pad [she] purchased from cvs”
- travis the nine-year-old sets up a game of monopoly: marvel…

the sort of film your coworker will mention to you at the water cooler on monday. “really makes you think, huh?” there are no convictions in garland’s awful, awful script, presumably because if he bared his teeth in the defense of any given movement you’d see he’s all gums. every character is a blank canvas that he is seemingly afraid to drip paint on. i was going to call this the most centrist film ever made, but they paid infamous…