30 - 4/17 - Watch a movie that shares its name with a band
There are like 6 bands or artists, according to Apple Music, with the name Jaws. A little bit of a cheat? Yes. But this movie was so in the spirit of this LB series, that I felt like I had to include it in here.
This feels like a rib on the previous Jaws franchise. Like someone making a Troma-esque midnight movie only with a 23…
Vanilla Ice is Johnny Van Owen, called V by his crew. Definitely not a stand in for Robert Van Winkle. His crew, who are also his DJ, a dancer on his shows, and… uh, was the other guy a technician or something? It was never really explained. They also apparently all practice martial arts. While traveling on tour on their motorcycles, despite not packing clothes or having any equipment or anything, one of their bikes breaks down and they have…
This is so goddamn stupid. I absolutely loved it.
Michael Caine plays such a fun scenery chewing bad guy. A bad guy rogues gallery that also includes John C. McGinley and R. Lee Ermey. Awful one liners. A long anti-oil monologue by Seagal wraps this up. I want everyone to watch it.
15. 10/6 - Watch a horror movie with a purple poster.
(I’d definitely say the poster I picked counts as purple)
This was pretty gloriously fucked up all the way around. Some really great performances by Moore, Qualley, and Quaid. While well paced, it may have run a little long in the first two acts, but that’s very, very slight nit-picking. But when it picks up steam, JESUS. The last 40 minutes are about as uncomfortable (in a good way)…
