You either die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself become idk mid tbh

A star, a series, and a genre completely outmoded by a world they're no longer part of. An ancient knight pitifully swinging his sword in the temple he once heroically guarded. A director who shouldn't be here mining old bones to serve a corporate overlord. It’s Belloq at the altar on the island saying, “I’m going to give the Ark the reverent, emotional…

As a rule, and as a deliberate correction from my wild youth as a YouTube comment warrior, I try not to indulge in any hard-line opinions. No extremist hot takes. No dismissing anyone else's experience. No pretense that my views on movies are in any way objective. 

In short, I try to not be an asshole. The world has enough of those. Everyone has opinions. Some may be better informed. Some may be better articulated. But it's not my place to…

My jaw is on the floor. So thematically and formally radical that its few moments of recognizable convention are almost as shocking as all the times it’s slapping you in the face. What Frankenheimer is doing here is unbelievable, fish eyes, frantic cuts, shoulder-mounts, subjecting you to a nightmare of subjectivity. Twitchy nerves, cold sweats and wide angles. A deal with the devil, signed on the dotted line. A corporation preying on your dissatisfaction, exploiting your body and your desires…

To paraphrase Joe Rogan, I –

Wait let me back up.

Before he turned into the extreme right's Joseph Brobels, Joe Rogan was just a failed stand-up turned reality show host. Outside of propbroganda, he's probably still best known as a UFC commentator and a host the bug-eating bonaza Fear Factor. But I'll never forget his time as a judge on the stand-up comedy competition show Last Comic Standing.

If you weren't lucky enough to be in the 13-to-16-year-old demographic…

About as close as you can get to sitting down on Grampa Sly's knee and having him tell you his life story. Or at least the parts he wants you to hear. Of course he's not gonna tell you about the porno he was in. You're not old enough yet.

It's fun to hear Stallone talk through his biggest hits, but besides touching on the uncomfortable relationship with his dad, (I don't know if I would ever forgive my dad…